Monday, January 4, 2010

Intentional Friendships


Here is the map I provided in yesterday’s message (You can download the message and notes here).

The concept of this diagram is not original with me. I got the idea from Dr. Terry Walling. He developed this diagram for leaders so they could chart out the influences in their lives. Terry is an outstanding leadership coach and he loves Jesus. I highly recommend his training resources and him as an instructor. He has been a huge blessing to me.

There are several parts to this picture that need explanation. If you listen to the message, you will get a better understanding of why you should and how you can use this “friendship map.”

The first step is to define what you need. Ask yourself, “What are four areas of my life that I need improvement in?” Then list them in the “Need” section.

The second step is to discover other leaders that could coach you in these areas to enable you to get better at them. List their names in the “Being Led By” section.

The third step is to define what you have to offer others. Ask yourself, “What has God gifted me with that I can coach others in?” List what you have to offer others in the “Have” section.

The fourth step is to discover people God would have you invest what you have into their lives. List their names in the “Leading” section.

The fifth step is to define and discover the people you can learn along side of. These are people that want similar outcomes in their life as you.

You will notice there are two types of people that you grow with. One group is “In Christ” and the other is “Out of Christ.” Those “in Christ” are redeemed Christian saints that love Jesus and are seeking to be His disciples. Those “out of Christ” are not Christian believers.

As Christians, we are responsible to lead a cross-centered life, hence the cross in the middle of the diagram, that enables those “outside of Christ” to hear and respond to the Gospel of Jesus. We are to share our faith with those friends we love that we are growing in life with.

The final step is to live out the diagram. It’s not complicated, although it does require intentionality. I have been amazed with the impact it has had on my life.

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